Is this a karma thing? One gut-punching injury after another on Sunday forced many of us to step back and examine whether we had wronged the universe and had earned some sort of just dessert. Amon-Ra St. Brown was ruled out in the first quarter after sustaining a concussion. Mike Williams‘ right leg was contorted in a nauseating position underneath him, resulting in a high ankle sprain. DK Metcalf injured his patellar tendon and needed the emergency bowel movement cart to take him to the locker room. My precious baby angel, Breece Hall, crumbled like a stale cookie on a run to the left, and our greatest fears were realized in the form of a torn ACL. I am not okay.
Week 7 already had our favorite players on bye and now the sunshine was completely blotted out by the ashes of our fantasy football season. The tears had not yet dried to salt from the active players who have completely defecated the basinet in 2022. Tom Brady and Aaron Rodgers? Dust. Najee Harris? Artax in quicksand. Elijah Moore and Kyle Pitts? Purely mythological. Fantasy football is a futile effort in predicting the future every season, but 2022 seems almost personal. The quality of gameplay and coaching is at an all-time low as if supervillain Roger Goodell has a voodoo doll that stabs fantasy managers once they enjoy even one inkling of hope. It already seems as if we’re Princess Jasmine locked in Jafar’s hourglass while the injury cobra strikes at our gridiron heroes. We know nothing… except that the reminders of our cluelessness will repeat every week, just like I will cover the top fantasy football storylines in this column. Rant not over, Week 8 is incoming with another ice pick to the eardrum.
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Blue Devil DAWG
Don’t look now, but a 6-1 NFC team is led by a Konami Code QB. Once you mention that it’s Daniel Jones and the New York Giants, some would still turn up their noses in disgust. Believe it or not, 2022 Daniel Jones is better than pre-Diggs Josh Allen. He is winning games by elevating the personnel around him. That personnel, by the way, is Saquon Barkley and an assortment of grocery clerks and dishwashers. They are gritty and hardworking, but probably still get harassed pulling into the staff parking lot for having fake credentials. Jones is QB10 and faces a very favorable upcoming schedule. The Giants are now nearly certain to reach the postseason in Brian Daboll’s debut, which has been a master class in making chicken salad out of chicken…you know. The Josh Allen parallels are apt, especially considering that Jones is already approaching a career-high in rushing yards and has only committed four turnovers in six games.
Another Nice Fanny for Shanny
The Christian McCaffrey trade from Carolina to San Francisco is one of two things. Either it’s like giving Jeff Bezos a wad of cash for Christmas or handing a toddler a stick of dynamite. The embarrassment of riches bestowed upon offensive guru Kyle Shanahan at the skill positions has now crossed into the realm of plain stupid. Unfortunately, Shanahan hasn’t always done a very good job of extracting the best result out of his most talented players. George Kittle doesn’t run very many routes because of his value as a blocker, even though he is virtually unstoppable as a receiver. Deebo Samuel‘s usage in the passing game plummeted last season because of his role as the omnipotent “wide back.” Christian McCaffrey was averaging nearly seven yards a touch on Sunday in his debut, but saw exactly zero third down snaps and was non-existent in the second half when the Chiefs were ripping the 49ers to shreds. Just a friendly reminder that Kyle Shanahan still has a losing record as an NFL head coach. For as sharp as he is preparing for games, he is equally inept at adjusting after kickoff. The world remains on the edge of its collective seats to see what CMC can accomplish in this system with a full week of practice reps under his belt in preparation for the Rams.
Hopes and Dreams Floating in the Breece
Forlorn. Melancholy. Despondent. Morose. There is a dark cloud over the fantasy football community after losing the rookie RB1 to an ACL injury. Breece Hall is a special talent with a blindingly bright future. It hurt so much to see him immediately perform at an elite level, then get ripped from our chests like a wax strip to the heart. We had not yet come to terms with Javonte Williams suffering a similar fate before another monster fantasy performer near and dear to us was also lost for the season. To add insult to injury, Michael Carter‘s role will have to stay the same. The Jets immediately traded for James Robinson, who had presumably fallen on his shield after losing the positional battle with Travis Etienne. Injuries at the RB position are a cruel reality that emerges with barbed daggers every season. Next man up! Grab the rifle of the fallen and push on. We wish you a speedy recovery, Breece. You have legions of passionate fans sending good vibes your way.
Matty on Ice
Why Matt Ryan? Why now? For all the QBs in the NFL stinking it up this season, it was shocking news to hear that the Colts were benching Matt Ryan for the rest of the season. He was fantastic in Week 6 but looked haggard and weary again in Week 7’s loss to the Titans. Texas grad Sam Ehlinger, aka Sam L-inger or Sam Meh-linger, is now the interim starter over former Super Bowl MVP Nick Foles. This is a cry for help. Frank Reich’s seat is blistering his cheeks and GM Chris Ballard is hanging onto the cliff’s edge with a single fingernail. Starting Ehlinger over Ryan reeks of desperation. The Colts are 3-3-1 this season, right behind the 4-2 Titans, and have looked very good in their wins. I fear this will blow up in everyone’s face, including lacing fantasy studs Jonathan Taylor and Michael Pittman with shrapnel. Most benchings are hardly surprising, but this one has the football community dumbfounded.
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