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Jim spends the offseason studying every free-agent addition. He surveys the coaching carousel and examines how changes in offensive philosophy and personnel will affect the fantasy landscape. After tireless and exhaustive hours of preparation, Jim drafts what he believes is a championship-caliber assembly of can’t-miss studs, breakout players, and sleepers. Despite all this, all of Jim’s league-mates continue to clown him anyway.
Why is that?
The answer is most likely because Jim has a boring name for his fantasy football team.
Don’t be like Jim.
Here are 10 outstanding fantasy football team names to give your squad some swagger.
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10) Elementary! My Dear Watson
It’s a bit high-brow, and every time you beat your opponent, you can say, “How did I beat you? Why, it’s elementary, my dear Watson!” It will drive the rest of your league crazy.
9) Murray Christmas
It’s hard not to go full Charles Barkley whenever you say this team name. Whether your league loves this name or not, they won’t be able to resist saying it under their breath every time they see it. I bet you just did the same thing right now, didn’t you?
8) The Big Trubisky
If you haven’t seen The Big Lebowski, go rectify that as soon as you have a few hours to spare. In the meantime, trust that in this team name, the Dude would abide. Bonus points if you actually end up rostering Mitch Trubisky with this team name.
7) Lord of the Rings
Admittedly, this team name is only for Tom Brady fans or those of you who have won your league more than once. If you are among the latter, then make your profile pic your face and let the rest speak for itself. Bragging is as much a part of fantasy football as drafting your team is, so go on and indulge yourself if you feel like it.
6) Sony Side Up
The best part about this team name is its unbridled positivity. Whether your team is in first or last place, it will always look like you’re enjoying the game nonetheless. How could anything get “Sony Side Up” down, after all? Plus, you could get creative with your trash talking, too. “How would you like this week’s thrashing? Sony Side Up?” The possibilities are endless.
5) It’s Von Like Donkey Kong
Very few team names are as fitting a line to drop before your matchup every week as this one is. Moreover, it’s just a fun and hilarious way to let the competition commence.
4) Suh-Tang Clan (Ain’t Nuthing Ta F Wit)
Because, why not? It’s going to take some gumption to not only have this team name but also live up to it. Might as well let the rest of the league know you’re coming for them.
3) Rolls Royces
Truthfully, it’s a far better team name with Royce Freeman on it. Nonetheless, this name has style, and it ensures you’ll be heading into each week like a baller.
2) Laces Out
An instant classic. This reference to one of the greatest comedies of all time will surely garner approval and respect from every member of your league.
1) Kerryon My Wayward Son
There’s no bending of the spelling or syllables to make this team name work (“Baby Got Dak,” “Mariota Had a Little Lamb” et al). Phonetically, thematically, aesthetically… this team name is beyond reproach. You can use it as a trash-talking challenge line. It works as a send-off to whomever you beat each week. It serves as a source of inspiration if your team hits the skids and you need to remember to, well, carry on. You don’t even need to roster Kerryon Johnson to make this work. In short, it’s simply perfect.
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Paul Ghiglieri is a featured writer at FantasyPros. For more from Paul, check out his archive and follow him @FantasyGhigs.
